


done

by markleemar



Category: Stray Kids (Band)
Genre: :P, Death, Gay, LGBTQ, M/M, Struggling, Suicide, car crash, i’m not good with tags lol, probably shouldn’t read, shitty - Freeform, tw
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-11-26
Updated: 2020-11-26
Packaged: 2021-03-10 02:41:51
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,584
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27726337
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/markleemar/pseuds/markleemar
Summary: in which minho was done with everything
Relationships: Han Jisung | Han/Lee Minho | Lee Know
Kudos: 7





	done

**Author's Note:**

> i just wanna put another tw as there’s always someone who doesnt read the tags, including me:P
> 
> TW : suicide - self harm mention

minho sat with his head in his hands, his homework spread across his desk randomly. he was crying once again, he couldn’t help - nor did he care - to stop them. he looked up and wiped the tears that kept coming off, he sighed to himself. 

he didn’t understand how he was still there, in the world, why he hadn’t given up yet. maybe it was his friends, the ones who were always there for him - and he knew they were but his thoughts kept telling him they would turn their back once they found out how he was really feeling. or maybe it was jisung, the pretty, squirrel-like boy he had fallen so deep for. or maybe it was his parents, even though they didn’t give a shit about him (and no, it wasn’t just his thoughts). 

minho stared at the wall, dumbly as he twisted the pen between his fingers. soft music was playing in the background, but for some reason he could feel the annoyance build up in him. he quickly grabbed his phone and turned it off, another sigh escaping his slightly parted lips.

it was already pretty dark outside, though it was only 7 pm. it was starting to get colder these nights, not that minho minded it though - if he was being completely honest, he kind of liked it. he could wear long sleeves, he didn’t have to worry about people staring at his arms. he didn’t have to pretend to be cold when it was 20° outside. 

minho let his gaze fall back down on his homework, tears started to prickle in eyes once again. he stood up hurriedly before turning to his closet. he picked out his favorite hoodie - it was black with a dark, fallen rose printed on the back - and his favorite pair of black jeans. he quickly put it on and went downstairs. he grabbed his mask, along with a black bucket hat, his phone in his pocket already. he said goodbye to his parents, getting an unbothered bye back, before making his way out the door and onto the street. 

the streetlights were the only thing that held the road lighted, no cars - only a few that passed by every once in a while. minho took a deep breath, the cool air filled his lungs as it somewhat calmed his nerves. he was too busy thinking about what he was gonna tell jisung, and his friends, to even care where he was going. his feet was just carrying him around wherever they wanted. 

he stopped and looked up, he was at the main road. cars were passing by in an speed that seemed too fast for an eye to catch. minho didn’t even flinch when one passed by right in front of him, he’d been there a lot lately so he wasn’t surprised when that was where he’d ended up. 

minho picked his phone from his pocket, his hands were slightly shaking as he opened jisung and his chats. flashbacks from happy memories with him started to appear in his head. he couldn’t help but let a smile play on his lips as the memories came. it was as if he could hear jisung’s laugh, as if he could see his smile, feel his breath against his skin from the times jisung would tease him, not knowing the effect it had on him. 

he was gonna miss those times, he really was and he knew it. he was gonna miss a lot, he already knew it, not that it made him change his mind - he was determined that today he was gonna do it. he started typing a text to jisung. he was almost done typing it when he started to second guess it. he read through the text and cringed hard, he quickly deleted it before typing a quick text instead and sent it before he could regret. he opened the group chat and typed another quick text “ily guys and imma miss y’all..” he was debating whether or not to put a <3 but he decided not to as he cringed lightly at the thought. 

minho checked if jisung had seen his text yet - which he hadn’t - before he put it back in his pocket. he took a deep breath and looked at the road in front of him. he could feel the hesitation rise in him but he ignored it. he saw another car quickly approached. it was not or never, he thought as he made eye contact with the driver as if he was apologising. he sent a quick pray to god it would work. when the car was too close to be able to stop or turn the car away, he stepped onto the road, closing his eyes and taking a breath for the last time. 

⋟

jisung was sitting on the couch in the living room, cuddling a blanket as he was watching a random movie. he heard his phone ding, notifying him. he ignored it as he continued watching. another ding rang through the room, but as the first time he ignored it, thinking there was nothing important. it was the end of the movie anyways, only a few minutes left so he told himself to check it when it was finished. 

once the movie was finished jisung turned to his phone. he saw it was a text from minho, both on their private texts and the group chat. he opened the group chat first, he read the text and something in his stomach told him something was wrong. minho wasn’t usually the one to show affection, and when he did it was usually a joke, but why would it be so random? he ignored the text and opened the private one. once he read it through, he somewhat gasped. without replying he quickly texted chan to meet him at the bus station near the main road. 

jisung quickly got up from the couch and hurried out, throwing on whatever shoe he saw and ran as fast as he could. something was definitely wrong and he was pretty sure anything he could do was too late, but he had to do something. 

once he arrived at the bus station, he spotted chan not so far away. jisung stared at chan, getting annoyed that he was taking so long as it was urgent. “hurry up!” he yelled, panic was filled in his voice and it was hard not to hear it. with that chan picked up his pace and soon was only a meter or two away. 

“something happened to minho, i just know it.” he spoke fast and hurried. chan, who had been calm until now, looked at him confused, his heart picking up speed as well. “what do you mean?...” he asked hesitantly. jisung took a breath to collect himself. his hands was buried deep in his pocket, though they were still shaking as bad as the rest of him. 

“so i... i got a text from minho. i don’t know if any of you guys did but that’s not the point. the point is that he first told me he loved me, more than just friends, and then he proceeded to apologize as if he didn’t mean it but if there wasn’t a ‘goodbye’ and ‘i’ll miss you’ there i would’ve believed it was. but i remembered how minho’s been struggling a lot and how he’s been going to the main road lately. apparently it calmed him or some shit but-“

“jisung, you need to calm down. you’re talking to fast i can barely even understand what you’re saying. but let’s go to the main road and see if he’s there, yeah?” chan asked, putting an comforting arm around his shoulders. jisung nodded silently and followed. 

once they arrived at the main road, it was chaotic. there was about two ambulances and many cars were there, standing still and not so patient. jisung’s breath hitched as the could feel the off tension. a woman was crying, and a police man was trying to comfort her while asking questions.

jisung quietly approached the two, chan following behind him. he hesitated a quarter of a second before speaking quietly. “uhm, excuse me, sir? mind if you tell me what happened?” 

the two turned to jisung and chan. the police man studied both of their faces as the woman kept sniffling. “do you know a lee minho?” the police man asked, his voice strong yet soft and gentle. jisung heart stopped and his eyes widened. he nodded along with chan. the police man turned and called for another police officer. soon enough the police man took the two aside with a serious expression. 

“i believe your friend, lee minho, was hit by a car. i don’t know if it was intentionally or if it was an accident but he was. the ambulances just arrived and are now soon going to be on their way to the hospital.” the police man spoke calmly. jisung brought his hand to his face and tears quickly started to fall down his cheeks. he felt chan’s arms sneak around his shoulders again, bringing him into a hug. 

⋟

jisung was standing at the casket, looking down at minho, the boy that had stolen his heart from day one. “i’m sorry...” he sighed, tears welled in his eyes again. he leaned down and pressed a soft kiss on minho’s forehead. “i’m sorry...” he apologized again as he walked backwards, back to his friends and family.

**Author's Note:**

> ew this was shitty-  
> but i hope you liked it :)


End file.
